Everytime Anime Otakus debates, the Universe explodes

Seriously, you fucking retards that I am going to label Anime Otakus are expecting too much out of a cartoon.

You keep wondering why Naruto can do a Kage-no-Bunshin or debating with your gay otaku friends on how Akatsuki can return the beams to its enemies. The reason that they can get away with it is that it is a fucking anim?. There's no logic behind it, because it is a freaking anime.

Everytime you try to put Physics in anim?, an anim? catgirl dies because you stupid shit keeps on trying to put logic on something that there is no logic involved.

Guess what? You are no different from Star Trek and Star Wars fans, which I am going to label Star Dorks. These dorks are like you, they try to bullshit you to explaining every single technology and term that exist in their stupid little world. I am going to say to you that you're life will not improve if you know the terms and technology in that show.

Remember dorks, it is just a cartoon, not your advanced Physics class.

Listed in Technorati under humor, satire, comedy, anime

Holy Shit, we got Narutards here!

Okay, I know that you like Naruto (a stupid fucking anime), so, stop bitching about it. All these anime assholes I've met here like Naruto and treat it as the best thing since slice bread.

Seriously, these anime fans are fucking stupid. They watch these shows, make poorly done websites for these poorly done anim?, and fight among also stupid fucking anim? fans about who is the greatest and coolest character of them all.

But wait, there's more, they dress up in fucking costumes to look like the characters in the anim? and act like them. Well I have a message for you idiot, and I broke it down to simple set of formulas:

If Anime = not real

Then Anime = can get away with stupidity and look cool at it

Because You = real person

Then You = look stupid when you try to look like Naruto and try to do Kage-no-Bunshin

But yeah, Anime Otakus are still stupid even after reading this and still bitch about Naruto being the greatest anim? of all time.

Listed in Technorati under humor, satire, comedy, anime

I Don't Fucking Understand Anime Women

If there is any mystery left in the world that yet have to be unveiled, I say we need to unveil the mysteries of anime women. Because there is no way in hell I freaking understand them one bit.

Yes, I came to that conclusion because my loyal battle monkey let me play his collection of hentai games. He lent me his most beloved game: Tsukushite Agechau 4.

I knew that something will be wrong. From the look of the cover itself, to the uncanny grin of my loyal battle monkey while he handed me this game cd. I know I will be going to one hell trip to insanity, inanity, and stupidity.

The hentai game focuses on Koji Aoyama, a loser high school student that was run over a speeding truck, that miraculously survived, sent to the hospital, spent a lot time moping about death, and yeah fucked a doctor too (literaly). And top of that, he has four girls fawning over him. Yeah, Koji is pretty much a loser in this game.

There are four schizophrenic girls, ranging from the idiot Himeko, the stupid Shizuku, the deranged Takano and the lunatic Leo, which are all childhood friends of Koji, are also going to live in his uncle’s house, and all of them are going to work together at his restaurant. And take note, these four girls all like him, and they will fight to the death to who will grab him as her prize. This is where the path to insanity lies.

To cut a long trip to hell and insanity short, we'll just tackle one of the crazy girls in this crazy game. Why, it is no other than the deranged Takano. I let Koji choose her, because she seems to be the least insane of the group. Boy, I was fucking wrong.

Anyway, since I am a bad-ass priest, I will just jump to the most important points of the game, because otherwise, you will become stupid too, if I tell you in details what insanity you will face in Tsukushite Agechau 4.

At first, she showed a genuine affection to Koji. Okay, it starts mild enough.



But that is where it will hit you when you least expect it. After a few minutes of fucking mushy dialog, the trip to insanity begins. The girls begin to one-upping each other by endless flirting and getting all horny to Koji.

After many hilarities and insane encounters, like naked girls giving him a bath and the girls parading around Koji wearing nohting but skimpy lingerie; Koji finally thinks that Takano likes him.



No shit Sherlock! I think you hit the jackpot! You just figured it out? I mean after all the hints given to you by Takano herself and your stupid uncle keeps saying to you that all of your childhood friends likes you, you just figured it out? I guess it is not just the girls are insane here, I say the hero in this story too is insane.

And then, she became flirtatious and tried to hit on Koji. Since Koji is pretty much a loser and doesn't know how to score with the ladies, he ask if there is something wrong with Takano.



You bet Koji, there is something definitely wrong with her. Just look at her, she is drawn in awful proportions, her neck is too long and thin. Her hair is too long for comfort, just how long she does shampoo her hair anyway? And her hair, it is silver! No matter how much I try to figure it out, I never found a real girl who's hair is silver. Your guess is as good as mine, She's a freaking alien!

And then she apparently try to seduce Koji by wearing nothing but apron with strawberries in thier mouths combo, which of course, I'll censor the image for you. Because, I know that you all are viewing my blog in your work. So if there is anything that could cost you your job, don't let it be this one. It is not even worth it.



But what is the craziest thing here is they are pretty much seducing Koji with alluring looks and gives you a puzzled look? What the fuck? The nerve of these girls.
They dress only in apron seducing Koji but they are puzzled because they don't know what they are doing? Man, I don't understand 2D women.

And so Koji here face the ultimate dilemma of all losers in existence, how to compliment a deranged girl.



Yeah Koji, I guess we'll try to choose hint here. Because I need to know what the fuck is going on in thier demented minds.

Listed in Technorati under humor, satire, comedy, anime, hentai

You're not Kenshin Himura, Stop being Stupid

There was this club in college that I tried to join for I thought that it is a good art club. Hell, I was wrong; I was stupid at that moment. I was so wrong. What I joined was not an art club; it was a freaking anim? freaks club!

Instead of teaching its member on how to draw well and do some great art, all members except for me, are raving lunatics discussing the next episode of the latest anim? and shit like that.

But what amazes me is the idiot who thinks he's Kenshin Himura (if you are an idiot not to know this character, he's the lead character in a comic series Rurouni Kenshin). He brings his stupid made-up sword (it is not the bokken, just a wooden made-up sword), and he's practicing his swinging slashes right for everyone to see (Yep, our club cubicle right by the university hallway). Holy shit! Whatever stuff this idiotic (former) club mate of mine is smoking, I would like to have some of that stuff. Because it really makes you lose grasp of reality and do stupid shit like that and not be embarrassed about it.

Because of his stupid antic, now the art club I joined was labeled by ordinary people (the ones that are not raving lunatic about anim?) as a stupid club made up by anim? otaku freaks. Great job you dipshit.

We are now forever labeled as freaks because of your stupidity.

Now that I finally got out of college, if I ever saw you in public again, doing some Kenshin imitation or whatever shit you are doing, I am going to make your nose bleed.

Listed in Technorati under humor, satire, comedy, anime

Hey Dork, You Are Not Japanese, Stop Playing J-Pop Songs

You know, there's always a dork wherever I go. Coffeeshops, hotels, buses, malls and even in work; there is always a dork that always play J-Pop songs. Hell, it would be tolerable if he at least played these a few times in a week. But no, he/she has to be a dork and play it over and over again. On top of that, he/she plays stupid fucking anim? songs.

So being the merciful bad ass person I am, I walked to the dork and had a conversation with them. The coversation went as follows:

Me: "Hey, that's a nice song you got there"

Dorks: "Yup, that's the latest song from Puffy Yumi"

Me: "Ah, great. Do you understand the lyrics?"

Dorks: "No, but they sound cool!"

Oh yeah, he had it coming. I gave the ass kicking that they fucking need. By the time, I'm through with the assholes; they need plastic surgery to have a face again. At least they can have a plastic surgery; maybe they can ask their surgeons to give them a Japanese look.

So, the moral lesson for today is if you are not Japanese and do not understand Japanese, please stop being stupid and turn off your J-Pop Music.

Listed in Technorati under humor, satire, comedy, anime, music